"I think what’s happening is that movement is moving very quick,” says Buck Angel, a female-to-male transgender porn star, of the trans activists who are pushing for new pronouns perhaps faster than the American public is ready. “And they’re very political, OK? Here’s the problem when you do that, you alienate, right? And when you alienate you’re not getting your message out there."
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The Anger Over ‘Tranny,’ From Neil Patrick Harris to RuPaul to Dan Savage - The Daily Beast

prettykinkythings said: Oh wow, this is kind of disgusting. Way to dismiss an entire group of people.

I’m sorry, but who’s dismissing anyone? The point is, if you read the whole article, that people who fully support Transgendered people (like Buck Angel, who is Trans himself; or Dan Savage, an active supporter of LGBT rights) are being attacked for making mistakes, as though they were the enemy. I read this article as a request for the trans community to have patience with those of us cisgender folks who do care, because the landscape is changing so fast, we can’t always keep up.

Perhaps the folks quoted in the article should have known better before they spoke; but I’m sure that Neil Patrick Harris’ apology, and Dan Savage’s mending of his ways once he realized he was being offensive, were sincere. Dan Savage advocates for respect, yet he’s still charged with being intolerant on a regular basis by people - including lesbians, transgendered folks, bisexuals, etc. - who don’t seem to see that’s he’s on their/our side.

Buck Angel’s point in the article is that given the rapidity with which the language is changing, if even supporters are subject to angry attacks, how can the message of acceptance and embracing people of all genders and orientations get through to the ignorant general public? Educating people, as Buck does, earns a lot more respect and acceptance than vitriolic attacks will.

I am queer, and I have a number transgendered friends, and a trans family member. If they prefer non-binary pronouns, I certainly make the effort to remember. But I hope that if I slip and forget this person prefers ze, or ey, they understand the mistake isn’t because I’m thoughtless or a bigot, but because I simply haven’t fully internalized the changes taking place within a language I’ve been using for the better part of 40 years.

Unless there’s some kind of consensus reached on etiquette, there’s no possible way to avoid sometimes giving offense. Not because we’re being dismissive, but because there are too many variables, and what one person considers offensive, another finds preferable. I have been thanked for asking trans friends and family what pronouns they prefer, and I’ve also received angry responses for asking. Could folks cut us supporters some slack here? We ARE trying.

That’s how I read the article. And the quote above.